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We Rent. We Slay. We drink Rosé

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#FoundatSimon 9
Accessories & Shoes 11
Clothing Rental Service 19
Fashion Subscription Box 1
Holiday Style 3
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Jewelry Rental Service 4
LiketoKnow.It 6
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Authors

Stephanie Mack Kearney

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Rent. Slay. Repeat.

All in Spring Style

{EARMUFFS} You know the line from Old School where Vince Vaughn tells Luke Wilson to say “Earmuffs” before he talks? After spending a few days in NYC, I think there should be an equivalent for coddlers to shout at adults within earshot so they shut their listening ears before inadvertently overhearing nonsense. Coddlers is my term for college-age folk who act like toddlers. Coddlers are the worst type of humans because they are just drunk toddlers…take your average threenager, add bottomless mimosas, backne, & a total lack of situational awareness. Hello, coddler.
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The chumps are retelling stories of poor life choices, using repulsive language in the presence of God & everyone, & offering the WORST advice to one another while discussing their daddy’s money adventures.
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The IG account @overheardnewyork is real. The vapid absurdity of things I’ve heard will make your hair extensions fall out.
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STORY TIME - Most restaurant tables are super close here because the concrete jungle where dreams of sharing eggs with strangers is a thing Alicia Keys didn’t sing about.
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I had to ask a patron to move his legs off my chair so I could sit after the hostess kindly gestured to move. Let’s not forget my overwhelming body size…that has not miraculously changed. I’m still one step down from an NBA power forward and brah is unphased. THIS HALF AS* NUGGET didn’t budge. I was forced to say excuse me, & THIS CHILD OF THE CORN moved his hobbit feet into the tiny aisle so I had to step over his definitely skipped leg day calves. SON, why?
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Then, & this is not a dramatic retelling, hand to god it’s the honest truth, THIS FRATTY CHIPMUNK in chubbies proceeds to offer his hot take on the “expletive girl” that refused to perform acts with her mouth on what I am sure is a MINIATURE part of his body while they were on a road trip. JESUS, TAKE THE WHEEL.
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These kids, y’all. They were obnoxious in the worst way. Do you know what is obnoxious in a good way? My latest podcast adventure with @trailblazersrise. GO LISTEN NOW. I talk about things. April & Kim are my new BFFs. Link is in my bio. 👆🏻EARMUFFS off.
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#jacksonvilleblogger #podcast #babeswhohustle #professionallyobnoxiouspodcast

Let’s have a serious talk for a moment, shall we? I know…you don’t visit my page for that reason but in reality, I’m an adult and sometimes I am let’s say, half serious about a handful of things. There will still be a bad Dad joke weaved into this caption at some point, so keep reading for that insertion.
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Today’s serious topic is savings…and I don’t mean your Roth IRA or 401k, again, I’m only half an adult. I’m talking finding bargains on things you love, saving cash on clothes, and doing the usual things you love for less. (Not this isn’t a Groupon post…but if they want me to join Tiffany Haddish in a commercial, I’m here for them.) I’m talking about a local program here at the @stjohnstownctr for military members and their families.
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May is Military Appreciation Month. It is one of those months that doesn’t always get a ton of fan fair because May is full of birthday’s, graduations, weddings, etc. but the team at the Town Center does it right. If you are a member of the military, veteran, or family member swing by the office with your valid Military ID, grab a savings pass, and buy things you love for less. AND it is not just valid for the month of May. This is a year-round savings extravaganza y’all.
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If you want to know more about the program, click the link in my bio. You know that by now. It's where I share my ramblings without the character limit enforced here. If we’re being honest, it’s repurposed content from last year, BUT borrowing is what I do best. (See what I did there?) You may also know by now my BFF is no longer with the Town Center team because she took her talents to ATL, but that doesn’t make me love this place any less. Good shopping and good wine is always a good time.
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Now I’m off to kick off my Memorial Day festivities doing all the above with my sister from another mister who is here to ensure my raw chicken skin will get a little Vitamin D this weekend. But not too much, I don’t want to wrinkle because it’s also Skin Cancer Awareness month. See? So many things, one small month, so little time.
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#jacksonvilleblogger #styleblogger #ootd #foundatsimon #jacksonvillefl #jacksonvilleevents #southernstyle #babeswhohustle

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